On Wed, 2009-12-02 at 01:31 +0000, Thomas Dalton wrote:
2009/12/2 Michael Peel <email(a)mikepeel.net>et>:
On 30 Nov 2009, at 18:17, Thomas Dalton wrote:
2009/11/30 Michael Peel
<email(a)mikepeel.net>et>:
Does someone want to start drafting a press
release that can be sent
out, then?
Ok, here's a first draft:
http://uk.wikimedia.org/wiki/Press_releases/Free_online_news
Steve Virgin's just rewritten this - any comments on the latest
version? The current plan is to send it out tomorrow morning.
I like most of that rewrite - talking about how social media is
already playing a big role in telling the news is a really good idea.
I've made a few changes, though: I've changed it back to being a
statement (rather than a kind of op-ed) since that how I've seen other
organisations do these kind of press releases. I've been told that
press releases should be ready to just be put straight into a
newspaper (although that isn't likely to happen with this one - it
will get incorporated into a larger story, but the style should be the
same) and no-one would publish an article about what we think, they
would publish one about us saying what we think. I've also rearranged
the first paragraph so it isn't such a run-on sentence (I've been
trying to cut back on my use of commas!). Steve, what do you think? I
have essentially no experience of writing press releases, so I may
have it all wrong!
As you probably saw (I think you're the other person I was edit
conflicting with) you need to zap "that" and "the" where not
absolutely
essential. Not just for PR, but for all news style; give an impression
you want to say a huge amount more, but are squeezing the message as
much as possible to impart information quickly.
Mike, I edited one of the quotes; it should, under no circumstances, go
out until you okay that.
I disagree about taking out links - most press releases are online now
and can (i.e. most do) include inline links.
I would have preferred not to touch this, but - for once - I think 4+
years Wikinews experience is useful. ;-)
--
Brian McNeil <brian.mcneil@wikinewsie.org>|http://en.wikinews.org/wiki/Brian_McNeil
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