The Terrehaven, New Hampshire contingent of the international Wikimedia projects' editors' community is happy to announce the appointment of George S. Bauer, Jr. as chief day shift manager at a major fast food outlet less than four kilometers from his parents' home, the identity of which is being withheld to protect Bauer's interests in editing early 1930s and 1940s baseball card frequency statistics in several English Wikipedia articles which Bauer hopes may some day include citations to reliable sources.
"I tell you, last week there was nobody replying to my requests for the Cincinnati Rhino's back bench. Something's gotta give," the 17 year-old white male was heard to exclaim while walking with a close confidant down his neighborhood's suburban middle class streets, en route to the home of his median wage-earning white middle class parents forced by economic circumstance to the brink of any semblance of stability.
At press time calls to the nominating committee have not been returned.
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