Oh what a day! Which began when perforce
a visitor from afar began to exhort
us to look far afield, to travel and visit
learn brand new things, uncover, elicit
stories of users far from our homes!
And so we set out, bravely to roam:
perhaps ten full blocks! We found creatures strange!
They all spoke English! The stories exchanged
recalled those of family: Mom, Dad, and friends --
it's true, then, we _are_ all the same in the end!
Such relief not to grapple
with projects baroque,
languages strange, or
features "they" wrote.
In tune with this sentiment
let's celebrate dominance!
Hush the less pertinent --
let's not mention "those" continents.
"Hurray," we all cheer: "Our wiki is strong!"
Our projects are weak, but shush, sing along:
our rivals are fierce, but yet we prevailed;
it must be because our PHP scaled!
Ignore those naysayers who laugh at our UX
And claims by our editors that it obstructs:
separate pages for talk, no friends and no chat --
no Serious Software has all of that!
Well, enough -- we're not free
to change even fonts
without acres of missives
to agony aunts:
let's move next to strategy,
where with speeches prolonged
new hires will tell us
what we got wrong.
Three commands we were given:
the first, to be punctual.
By fiat we've banished
the correct but eventual;
from now on our code
is timely _and_ functional.
Our prior disasters are
vanished by ritual.
The second was novel:
exhorted to innovate!
Our change-fearing userbase
I'm sure will reciprocate.
Perhaps we can grow
new crops of good editors.
New users, new processes,
throw off our fetters.
Perhaps we need spaces
where we can be bold --
it's hard else to see
how to do what we're told.
The last was to integrate,
engage with community;
never mind our tall silos
and product disunity:
we can have orphaned features
conflicted teams, clashing visions --
"What's key is to synergize!"
says our stratcom tactician.
Community discourse
will fix all that ails us:
except for those times
when instead they've assailed us.
Lift a glass to the mission!
We'll muddle through fine.
We all love each other,
but this day's been a grind.