the mails sent here the last week made me think more thorough about what the actual problem is, and reconsider my posiiton. i added comments to the phabricator ticket at: https://phabricator.wikimedia.org/T90908#1612033.
to summarize the phabricator comments briefly, i experienced the wikimedia technical community as arrogant and ignorant, paradoxically despite the persons in the community are not arrogant and ignoring. mails get no answer, ticktes get closed immediately or reshuffled, patches sit in gerrit for years. contrary, the most successful open source community, linux / git, tolerates things which we would not tolerate (e.g. https://youtu.be/MShbP3OpASA?t=2895 f*ck nvidia). i experienced that community as extremely welcoming and helpful.
I could certainly see how one could feel that way. There have been several times when I have felt that way.
But I also feel like they are separate issues from what the Code of conduct is trying to address, and probably need different solutions.
"WMF persons assure on every contact that the client walks away happy."instead of a "WMF punishes misbehave". contrary to all the punishment suggestions above, it would be a positive policy. the ones involved in raising children already saw how much more effective a praising and lauding approach is - which i find works as well with adults. good is also that praising works international, no cultural barriers.
Well if we extend the metaphor - Even parents who believe in praise, would probably punish their child if s/he committed murder. The code of conduct is supposed to deal with the horrible situations, not the everyday situations. Its not supposed to be the be-all and end-all of everything.
-- bawolff