On May 18, 2011, at 12:47 PM, Sarah wrote:
I did say something in the end, and an uninvolved
admin left a note on
talk asking that the remarks cease. And though he meant well, and I was
and remain grateful to him for stepping in, he asked that they cease as
a matter of courtesy to me. But I didn't want them to stop as a matter
of courtesy. I wanted people to recognize that they were politically
unacceptable.
Then I had to explain why the remarks were offensive, when what I
really wanted was for them to end, and the meta-discussion to end.
Eventually it did die down and a couple of other editors stepped in,
and one of the earlier ones apologized, so it was okay.
But I would love to find a way to nip this kind of thing in the bud.
I've thought of trying to write an essay or a guideline -- but then
people will cry censorship, and will want to know what kind of comments
are suddenly not permitted, and who is to judge whether they're
offensive, and will argue that not all women agree on definitions of
sexism anyway. So it felt like too much of an uphill struggle even to
begin it.
This is the struggle of social justice issues on a wider scale, in many
ways-- how can we address the -isms of the world in a way that enables
processing and change to happen, versus pushing them further underground?
In some ways, seeing terrible behavior is the unfortunate and painful
reminder that there is work to be done... it's a balancing act that few
have been able to pull off in the last couple decades, I feel. In any
case, Sarah, I'm with you on this. You explain the challenges and
frustrations well, in a way that I think represents how many
previously-marginalized voices feel coming into these spaces.
dz
Actually one of those "previously-marginalized voices" is that of
socially inept geeks who have little contact with women and are unaware
that there is even an issue. They are clever little devils though and
will learn quickly if they receive consistent feedback. We just need to
make sure they get it. This: