The particular incident that prompted this thread has spawned a request for an arbitration case, which apparently is likely to be accepted.
I think this would be a really good opportunity for the committee to make a difference with respect to enabling people with a long history of rude interactions. If nothing else, discussions on this list have demonstrated that the often hostile editing atmosphere is a huge, huge deterrent for many editors and especially for women. Right now, only the most extreme behavior from non-vested users is sanctioned because of the many precedents exempting productive users from strict scrutiny.
It may be helpful for people who post here to post to the case request page, and express to the arbitration committee that the value of the editors being driven away far exceeds the value of the editors repeatedly given a pass. The selective enforcement of interaction standards, and the apparent influence of relationships on decision-making, set an example that hobbles any other efforts at improving the atmosphere of the project.