It does make some sense to care about the opinions of the people who are being harassed. Obviously if one person doesn't care about it we should be less concerned about the situation than if the editor does. However, that doesn't give the harassed editor complete control of the situation nor should it. Ultimately we need to do what's best for the project as a whole. We can tailor that based on individual situations, but we must still look to the project first. ****** The harassed editor deserves complete control over certain things: how wide to make the circle of people who know about the harassment and whether or not to bring law enforcement into the picture. The harassed editor also deserves veto power over attempts by third parties who wish to intervene and stop the harassment (bungled interventions can worsen the problem).
So when I interact with an editor who's being harassed I respect their wishes in these regards. This is one of the situations in life where the golden rule doesn't work: that person's preferences may differ from my own and, within the realm of reasonable choices, I fully support their decisions.
-Durova
Quoting Durova nadezhda.durova@gmail.com:
It does make some sense to care about the opinions of the people who are being harassed. Obviously if one person doesn't care about it we should be less concerned about the situation than if the editor does. However, that doesn't give the harassed editor complete control of the situation nor should it. Ultimately we need to do what's best for the project as a whole. We can tailor that based on individual situations, but we must still look to the project first.
The harassed editor deserves complete control over certain things: how wide to make the circle of people who know about the harassment and whether or not to bring law enforcement into the picture. The harassed editor also deserves veto power over attempts by third parties who wish to intervene and stop the harassment (bungled interventions can worsen the problem).
So when I interact with an editor who's being harassed I respect their wishes in these regards. This is one of the situations in life where the golden rule doesn't work: that person's preferences may differ from my own and, within the realm of reasonable choices, I fully support their decisions.
-Durova
No argument there. However, once attempts to deal with harassment extend to being more directly connected to the project or on-Wikipedia content, the level of control we should give the victim must be reduced.