Marc Riddell wrote:
on 12/19/07 11:06 PM, Todd Allen at toddmallen@gmail.com wrote:
For most admins, though, a marked change in the way they react to people (especially toward the negative) should be a good reason for someone to gently suggest they take a voluntary and temporary break from the tools before they're given an involuntary and permanent one. Ideally, this would be someone the person knows and trusts, and that the person being given the advice would be hesitant to simply brush off as a troll or a fool. As to those trusted people, the best thing you can do for those you trust and care for is to be honest with them, even when that honesty might sting a little.
Todd,
To me "civility" in a community of persons includes resources being available for the individual to reach out to for assistance when they need it. Within WP we have a lot of technical resources, with experts available, when a Community Member needs this kind of help (and, believe me, I've been one of them many times :-). But are there any resources available to someone who is needing some emotional support?
Many, many persons bring many, many pieces of emotional baggage to the Project. And we certainly can't do anything about that. But, when the emotional dilemma a person finds themselves in is a direct result of some activity in the Project, could we not provide some first step with an ear where the advice might, in fact, come down to the person needing a break? This could be something as simple as a list of persons who are willing to make themselves available to listen and offer some input. I find this process a lot more civil than just letting the person flame out on their own.
Marc Riddell
I'm also not really sure this works in practice. Such relationships tend to be best if they develop on their own, since that way genuine bonds have time to develop. By the time the friend has to say "Look, you seem really stressed out, why don't you take a couple weeks away?", bonds of trust have developed and the person might really pause to think "You know, I really have been out of line the past month or so." I'm not really sure such a thing can be replicated artificially though. When we have, for example, dispute resolution, it is -ideal- that the mediator, arbitrator, what have you, not know any of the participants well. That's not really so for someone offering help on what may be personal and sensitive issues.