For immediate release:
Jimbo Wales, founder of Wikipedia, was de-sysopped today by a coalition of rogue admins (the Troll League) and his account blocked indefinitely. The new GodKing, Rickk, immediately reinstated
RK weds Helga! The long-awaited wedding will feature mav147 wearing the traditional Muslim headscraf (click here for picture).
Kim Jong-Il brings peace to Palestine. The leader of the world's remaining Hermit Kingdom outlawed both Judaism and Islam throughout the Middle East, replacing all forms of religious worship with the playing of old Beatles records.
(I was saving these, but ... )
Uncle Ed