For Omar, Joe and I previously discussed trying to jump on John Oliver's social pull.... and I nearly forget to get him the quotes to do so. My suggestions:
The outside world knows very little about former Taliban leader Mohammed Omar, so little that it just found out he died two years ago. The US government, as <link>John Oliver</link> noted on Sunday, had "vivid descriptions" of him, including "hair: black" and "height: tall."
Shorter: As John Oliver noted last Sunday, the US government was able to come up with "vivid descriptions" of former Taliban leader Mohammed Omar, including "hair: black" and "height: tall."
Shortest: As John Oliver noted last Sunday, former Taliban leader Mohammed Omar "had been dead for two years, and [they] simply hadn't mentioned it.
Best, --Ed
On Wed, Aug 5, 2015 at 8:09 PM, James Alexander jalexander@wikimedia.org wrote:
Nice! Comments in line.
James Alexander Community Advocacy Wikimedia Foundation (415) 839-6885 x6716 @jamesofur
On Wed, Aug 5, 2015 at 5:56 PM, Joe Sutherland jsutherland@wikimedia.org wrote:
Hey all,
We just published "News on Wikipedia: Beijing wins Winter Olympics, MH370 wreckage recovered, and more" to the Wikimedia blog. URL:
https://blog.wikimedia.org/2015/08/05/beijing-olympics-mh370-wreckage/
We plan to send out five pieces of social for this story, spread through the next *three days* (or thereabouts) to keep things timely.
Please do comment for tone.
*Twitter:*
• China's capital Beijing will host the 2022 Winter Olympics. #NewsOnWikipedia
LGTM
[Sidenote - this is going to make the mental disambiguation of saying "Beijing Olympics" in my head really annoying]
• Barack Obama (@potus) announced his Clean Power Plan this week. #cleanpower #NewsOnWikipedia
LGTM
• Wreckage found on French island Réunion is from missing plane #MH370. #NewsOnWikipedia
Perhaps "French territory *of *Réunion" ? That sounds better to me but I'm not actually sure if it's more correct/better. You'll know the grammar side better then I :). Otherwise LGTM
• Zimbabwe have requested the extradition of an American hunter for #Cecil's killing. #NewsOnWikipedia • Secretive Taliban leader Mohammed Omar actually died in 2013. #NewsOnWikipedia
Both LGTM
*Facebook/G+:*
• Beijing beat out Almaty of Kazakhstan to become the host city for the 2022 Winter Olympics this week. #NewsOnWikipedia
Hmmmm.... I'm torn between "Almaty of Kazakhstan" (which sounds awesome but kinda sounds like an aristocratic name to me) and "Almaty, Kazakhstan". Happy with either, otherwise LGTM
• Barack Obama unveiled his Clean Power Plan this week. #NewsOnWikipedia
LGTM
• Plane parts found on the French territory Réunion were this week
confirmed as from missing Malaysia Airlines Flight 370. #NewsOnWikipedia
Same "of" question as above, otherwise LGTM
• Zimbabwe last week requested the extradition of American hunter Walter
Palmer following the killing of Cecil the lion. #NewsOnWikipedia
perhaps "f*ormally* requested the extradition" ? (I'm not actually sure that's true but I think it is? Just thinking that's different then some of the random statements they mentioned about wanting extradition earlier). Otherwise LGTM
• Currently, only two images exist of former Taliban leader Mohammed Omar. This week it was confirmed that he died two years ago. #NewsOnWikipedia
Hmm, I'm happy with this one (I like the images fact) but worry that it could feel like a bit of a non sequitur. Perhaps tying it together with something like:
- Currently, only two images exist of former Taliban leader Mohammed
Omar. *It's likely to stay that way unless more are found because t*his week it was confirmed that he died two years ago. #NewsOnWikipedia
best,
Joe
-- *Joe Sutherland* Communications Intern [remote] m: +44 (0) 7722 916 433 | t: @jrbsu http://twitter.com/jrbsu | w: JSutherland https://meta.wikimedia.org/wiki/User:JSutherland_(WMF)
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