[WikiEN-l] Is Slate an attack site?

[Steve Summit]

George Herbert wrote:
> While I agree that the mishandling of stalking / abuse situations has
> largely gotten us where we are today, I would have hoped to see people
> make that point in a civil and respectful manner rather than crossing
> the line into blaming the vicitms as you did above, Phil.
>
> This was not constructive, even if it was wrapped around an important point.

Actually, I think it *was* constructive.  It's a point I've wanted
to make (perhaps not so harshly) for a long time, but I've been
too chicken to make it at all.

I don't know Slim Virgin well enough to know whether she's a
reasonable person or a drama queen, so I GFly assume that she's a
reasonable person.  So I'm not talking about Slim Virgin here.  But.

If we Absolutely Must Not blame a victim, if we Absolutely Must
protect them, if we Absolutely Must accept their definition of
their own victimhood, then we're rather powerless against being
drawn inexorably into disastrously downspiraling drama-queenish
situations if we ever have the misfortune of getting involved
with someone who is simultaneously (a) a legitimate and
comfortworthy victim and (b) deranged.

We can't structure the debate so that any dissent with the
opinions of a victim is cause for accusation of having blamed
that victim.  We shouldn't allow such dissenters to be equated
with rapists (as has been repeatedly done in the whole drawn-out
meta-BADSITES debate).  If the emperor has no clothes, or if the
victim has no sense, we've got to be willing to say so.

So far I haven't said so, because I've been too paranoid about
being labeled a victim-blamer or a rape apologist.  But I salute
Phil for saying so, and I emphatically agree, and I guess I do
have to talk about Slim Virgin for a moment after all: if the
policy-that-can't-be-called-BADSITES makes no logical sense, if
no one (not even its supporters) favors the deleterious potential
repercussions which it would be all too likely to have, if the
only reason for clinging desperately to the policy is that
otherwise Slim Virgin, a respected and longtime contributor,
might be badly offended, then I'm terribly sorry, but Slim,
I'm afraid you're going to have to be offended (some more).