You're reminding me of the kid in the schoolyard
that everybody picks
on. The more he reacts to the slightest offence, the more he gets
picked on. Restraint in reacting to comments that may only be obliquely
viewed as offensive can have a profound effect in the way others on the
list see you.
There is a difference between schoolyard bullying and making false
accusations. The possibility of people taking them seriously is the
main one.