[Gendergap] I'm fed up - was Re: article differentials/unnecessary drama

Mon Dec 26 19:36:24 UTC 2011

Good point, Florence, however, there is the issue of "You need to act like
an adult, or make a halfway decent effort, to be here, and be unmoderated."
You ignore kids sometimes when they behave badly to get attention. You
can't always do that with an adult (or with kids, either).

And then, like Sarah just said, sometimes even a decent leader gets fed up
to the point of not being able to ignore bad behavior.

From,
Emily

On Mon, Dec 26, 2011 at 12:29 PM, Florence <anthere at anthere.org> wrote:

> Sarah.... Seriously.... When it comes to bullying... There are several
> options as to how to answer it.
>
> One is blahblahblah. It takes your time, it takes our time, it takes its
> toll on the environment, and is bad on your health :)
>
> When there is no bodily harm involved, I'd say to do just as with
> trolling. Let it go. Do not answer. Do as if it did not exist. Have a drink
> and forget about it. Do not escalate. Close your mind.
>
> Do us the favor of thinking us able to filter out what is ridiculous and
> non sense from what is relevant and meaningful criticism. Beria is capable
> of both. Take the second and shut your mind from the first as most of us
> learnt to do ;)
>
> Flo
>
> Sent from my smartphone, wearing boxing gloves, so please, disregard any
> type mismatch.
>
> On Dec 26, 2011, at 17:41, Sarah Stierch <sarah.stierch at gmail.com> wrote:
>
>
>
> And one think is discuss something - even when people have different
> opinion than yours, another completely different is play the "*poor me,
> nothing I do is good*" every time someone has a criticism against your
> work.
>
>
> I know I'm going to regret this, but, I can't be quiet anymore.
>
> I apologize to this ENTIRE mailing list for this drama erupting, and I'm
> going to be sending gender gap-l into my "special file" until my heart rate
> goes down. If people want to talk to me, they can find me on IRC or in
> private email, today.
>
> ---
>
> Beria, you're passive aggressive bullying behavior has reached my level of
> tolerance. I was going to email you privately, but, I decided against that,
> as *you* like to publicly share your feelings with the community,
> including specific people publicly.
>
> I have previously stated it, the last thing I wish to do is flood the list
> with things that are of no benefit or interest to the community. If me
> feeling bad about doing that is a bad then, so be it, I'm just sick and
> tired of you repeatedly reminding me of how I'm doing something wrong, and
> your declaration of "no one giving a fuck" about what you have to say
> because you aren't a fellow or you aren't a staff member is equally passive
> aggressive. I *worked* my butt off for this fellowship, and a fellowship
> with WMF is something I have been exploring and trying to develop for
> almost two years now. I'm honored to have it, beyond words. Anyone can
> apply to be a fellow Beria, and passively declaring that no one cares about
> you because you aren't paid, is just a mean slap in the face of everyone
> who works hard at WMF and as volunteers. And remember, there are chapter
> people who get paid to do their jobs, also.
>
> And this isn't just about me - you've done it to a lot of people. People I
> consider friends and colleagues, and people I don't even know well.
>
> I'm tired of having to worry about the things I post on this list,
> Internal-L, and Foundation-L, being to your disapproval. I'm also tired of
> the "monthly wait for what Beria will say to someone that will cause drama
> on a mailing list" situation. While I'm sure others greatly appreciate your
> attitude, I don't, and others do not as well. Your behavior and bullying
> (which is defined here: http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/bullying) makes me
> have little to desire to participate in mailing list discussions, and even
> *less* desire to even consider attending a conference that you are
> co-planning. Which is something, civility, we touch on here on this mailing
> list, as being a deterrent for people wanting to participate in projects.
>
> This isn't the first time that I've actively, *and* publicly asked you to
> stop behaving like this.
>
> The goal of this list isn't to just "talk" about wanting to make changes,
> it's about making changes. Whether they are online, in any language
> project, or offline, through outreach, programming, edit-a-thons, and
> whatnot. I talk my talk and I walk my walk, and I know others here do too
> (and I try to share those projects when they are brought to my attention).
> And if me being "too sensitive" or me "caring too much" or "me being paid"
> is a deterrent to us moving the meter (aka closing the gap) then I guess
> I'm the worst representative for the gender gap movement.
>
> Beria - I'm not going to argue with you about this, I'm not going to ask
> you to ever like me, be my bestfriend, or make an exception. I just want
> you to stop bullying me, others, and learn how your words affects others
> before you type them. I can handle criticism, when it's constructive. Not
> when it's rude, insensitive, unprofessional and at times attacking.
>
> *and on another note, regarding language:
> *
> I only share what I know, and sadly, I have a permanent off switch in my
> head that makes it tough for me to learn other languages (and no, Google
> Translate does not count as quality accessibility), so when I can only talk
> for English Wikipedia, I only post about English Wikipedia. We've never
> called this list an English only list, I encourage people to participate in
> all languages, so please, please please do.
>
> I apologize to everyone for making this a big freaking mess, but, I'm
> tired of this. Absolutely tired of it. Tired to the point where I have had
> trouble sleeping - I mean what the hell is that about?
>
> Sarah
>
>
> --
> *Sarah Stierch*
> *Wikimedia Foundation Community Fellow*
> >>Support the sharing of free knowledge around the world: donate today<http://wikimediafoundation.org/w/index.php?title=WMFJA085/en/US&utm_source=WMdonate&utm_medium=sidebar&utm_campaign=20110130SB003&language=en&uselang=en&country=US&referrer=http%3A%2F%2Fwikimediafoundation.org%2Fwiki%2FHome>
> <<
>
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